On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
Apparently you walked through my house with your dress on your head
Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
I can't get a boner in the bathroom of a buffet.
Condom broke. Took her to CVS for plan B and parked in expectant mothers spot. I laughed.. she cried
Want to come over? I'm getting stoned and watching Netflix and making s'mores over a candle in my room
I'm sports announcer narrating myself making a sandwich. Your weed wins.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
can we just pause for one second and address the fact that balls were out last night
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
I just watched an intern spill two trays of coffee inside a spinning door
Best exit from a building ever
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
TSA doesn’t allow handcuffs in carryon bags. Super fun they confiscated them in front of my boss and coworker.
Randomize