i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
What can I say, he stumbled upon the key to my heart: orgasms and mac 'n cheese.
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
I was just handed a bible on my walk of shame....are you there god? its tequila tuesday's hangover
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I drank half a bottle of wine while watching the Olympics opening ceremonies. I catcalled at handsome athletes. Stop me.
He only likes me when I'm naked and I don't like being around him clothed. It's the perfect relationship.
the best part of christmas was when my mom opened the handcuffs that were supposed to be for jen. Surprisingly, not the most awkward situation of the day.
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
In other news: I massively over-caffeinated this morning. Everything is vibrating and I can SEE THROUGH TIME
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I'm eating a block of cheese like its a sandwich in the tsa line
Ugh. My life is a never ending cycle of bad decisions and taquitos.
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
I miss seeing you
i hope for the sake of your safety you were not with your girlfriend while sending texts like that at 3 am
No one can touch me, I'm made of fruit.
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