if creeping was an olympic sport, i would be a lock for the gold right now.
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
the fire alarm went off. we werent sure whether to leave or turn the music up louder
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I need to get skinnier so that I know when pregnancy scares are real...
I don't care how many kiddie pools are in our house. One is too many.
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
Just smoked pot with a guy who has apparently been living in the woods for over a month. He just walked out of the woods. This is not real life.
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Please don't judge me for my hormonal purchase, judge me for my awesome rack.
sorry for pouring tequila vodka and whiskey down your throat and left you to sleep on a table
If the world ends and i have no vodka please just kill me.
Normal people find beers in their gym bag, right?
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
She dry humped my leg in the raw while I was still dressed, came, and then fell asleep on top of me. All I got was a bruised thigh. 2020 needs to end.
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