I think I took your hangover as a birthday present
i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
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Nicee. Atleast your phone doesn't change pen in to PENISsSSSSSSS like mine does
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
I accidentally walked in the wrong house but I somehow left with a chicken leg. Good fucking night.
Vodka tonic time....wish me luck!
Go for it my man. I'm saving my shit show night for tomorrow. Gonna make it a big one just to let the entire bar know why I'm single
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I put xanax in the cake batter
Did you really? It all makes sense now.
I'm cutting her off I can't have my good name soiled with these kinds of shenanigans
Shit is preposterous
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
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