I only kidnapped one of them. chill
i woke up under my mattress pad with him laying naked next to me and his wwjd bracelet on my nightstand.
nice, that's exactly what jesus would do.
This is how I know I have no life... Jon and Kate are my emotional roller coaster.
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
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Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
About to go out with the girl of my dreams tonight. I am looking at one of her hottest fb pics, to practice not looking at her huge tits.
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
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URGENT INPUT I'm at a renesance fair after party and I'm 100% lined up to fuck their sword swallower OR their contortionist. Dont say both - which direction doth I roll?
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
Worst case scenario- he paid me for sex with meatloaf. There are worse thing, right? I mean at least is was good meatloaf.
It's just not St. Patrick's Day until someone pukes on your panties.
I wish I could open myself up and check on my liver. Make sure it's hanging on. Ya know?
just woke up and had to check if i still had pants on, i really need to stop drinking
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