I didn't shave. On purpose
I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.
He broke up with me by playing Lynyrd Skynyrd "Free Bird".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
Just when you think you're never going to have sex again, BOOM you're naked in bed with a guatemalan
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
she was sobbing drunk in the backseat about her dead cat and how the guy in the front seat didn't want to hook up with her
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I really resent how she stayed home and ruined my plans to watch sci-fi and masturbate.
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
You called me into the kitchen so you could show me that you were peeing in the kitchen sink and then told me to leave bc you couldn't do it with me watching
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
Our Uber driver pulled over to show us Tinder some dick pics. Top that.
Randomize