Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
Im drinkin out of a coconut! I think im gonna dip my balls in it!
There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need to stop having one night stands with guys in my building so I can have someone to borrow milk from without it being awkward
I'm going to pre plan my black out tonight. I think I'll set a change of clothes out on my bed and unplug the oven.
Dude, someone broke the toilet seat in two, the is a pair of panties on the kitchen counter, and the entire house smells like a brewery
Nothing says walk of shame like leather pants in daylight
I'll be there in 10. I need you naked and ready. Warm up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You can't mix blow jobs, bacon, and Star Wars.
A) just did. And b-z) that sounds like a great Sunday morning.
Also I told several people at the bar last night that my dad the alligator wrestler died wrestling an alligator. So if anyone asks that's real.
My adderall dealer raised his prices due to "impending inflation" ... never buying from a college grad again
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
I woke up with what has to be a whole pack of smarties loose in my bra. Was that your fault?
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
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