hey no worries the mystery has been solved- i jst sneezed and my undies popped outta my nose.
I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
Some girl in the stall next to me just yelled "fuck yes i started my period!" she came out of the stall and we high fived. who am i to judge? i do that every month.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night
So, do you ever feel like EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOUR FRIENDS IS INVOLVED IN A MASSIVE AND INTRICATE CONSPIRACY TO COCKBLOCK YOU AT ALL COSTS?
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
Fuck I am starving. I don't think I've eaten in the past two days.
You didnt need to. Gin is like eggs, its a perfectly nutrionally balanced meal.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were upset that she was flirting with your boyfriend so I thought the best game plan was to show her my boobs and get her to make out with me instead. I am the greatest friend on absinthe.
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
Randomize