we are at a mexican restaurant and the tv is playing mexican porn. dad won't stop watching.
remember that time that crown gas station wouldn't sell us a lighter so we had to use matches and birthday candles to smoke with a toilet paper roll? sometimes i miss high school
The worst thing about having a parent with a prius is that they can walk in on you without any warning
please keep texting me so i can pretend someone likes me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my dad is going to jail this weekend
where are we going to get our weed from?
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
Just remembered I hit myself in the face with a bottle then did the nose test and decided I was still good. Don't think anyone noticed.
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i told the cop we knew everyone at the party, it was 250 of our closest friends and she's like funny nobody on the balcony knew whose house this was
Thats why they were on the balcony!
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
there's a 50/50 chance the night will end in alcohol-induced rituals of satanic nature
what do u think we would be doing right now if we were together
Urinating on unicorns
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