i think i have two assholes
ugly people sure do ruin things
I am so high I am beginning to unironically like Vanessa Carlton.
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
as soon as I walked into work this morning, my boss called me out on my hangover, patted me on the back and said I'm getting time an a half for even showing up. Did I really look that bad this morning?
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
I'm sexting at the thanksgiving dinner table...this is a new holiday tradition.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Made a pan flute out of the varyingly empty beer bottles on the table. Played a glorious tune that paid tribute to the winds.
his finger was half off and he was more concerned that he wasnt at home shooting cucumbers out of his potato gun.
HOW DID ALL OF US MISS THE OBVIOUS: I'LL SHAKE YOUR SPEARE
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
I miss painting strippers for Christmas. Holidays not the same without glitter and body paint
I'll be your substitute stripper tonight.
Randomize