I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
you took a scissor and started screaming "I WANNA KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO BE BALD"
Ever have a poop and think... that has no business coming out of a human? Like it looks like a sick dog's or a ferral animal's?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sorry I had passed out by this time I think, with the chicken fingers ON my face in my bed, with all the lights on, and ketchup all over.
Threw up on the baby. National Tequila Day is the eve of National I'm A Horrible Nanny Day.
After a long night of drunk sexting I have to the ninja roll at the front door to see who showed up.
I agreed not to hook up with any randoms while she's on vacation, if that isn't a show of good faith then I don't know what is...
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
I'm sitting on your porch drinking wine from the bottle. Just so your new neighbors know what kind of people are in the neighborhood
Conversations really do change when your social worker had your dick in her mouth the other night.
While buying Plan B the lady at the counter looked at me and said hope you have a successful night as I walked away in shame
It was all like "my feathers evolved from scales of a reptile bitches!!" and I was all like "damn this chocolate milk is AWW SOOME!"
Randomize