the guy I was hooking up with asked me if he could wear a guerilla suit during sex.
I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This weekend has taught me that sometimes, being buried under a mattress is the safest place in the room.
I just found out that I slept with Kate Gosselin's publicist back in June . Brb I have to wash myself endlessly.
I'm sitting with my parents watching football and moaned when I saw his shirtless picture. They looked at me weird so I had to turn the moan into a laugh. A sad, really horny laugh.
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
You are the best. Or certainly adequate for tempering my unholy desires.
That's the nicest thing you've ever said to me.
At what point can I admit that I hate going to house parties?
I don't wanna stand in your shitty kitchen making small talk while I guard the quality booze I brought.
Never in my life have I been so excited to nap as I am right now.
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