I think i ate a live goldfish last night. that i caught with my hand in a kiddie pool. my stomach really hurts.
Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently on the way out of the ER i asked the nurse to doggie-bag me some more morphine.
I just test ran being their maid. I'm getting 50 bucks a month and they're buying the costume.
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
Whiskey and I have a long and stories tradition of excellence
I'm still confused. So he's NOT your cousin by blood, but WAS your cousin, on two separate occasions, by marriage? Still too weird I think...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
I told my grandmother all I want is a nice guy who likes to be tied up.
It's like fucking tetris in this bed
I don't care. She's the only girl to make me feel like my face is melting when she blows me.
All I ever do is give guys anxiety problems and flaccid penises.
I want to ride that like one of the Horsemen of the Apocalypse- with bourbon in hand and without mercy.
Randomize