Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know how God could bestow someone that emotionally confused with such an awesome penis.
you made me have a moment of silence for the half of a sub sandwich that you dropped on the floor earlier
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He literally wrote out a schedule. On it, there's a taco break, and a spot where I start crying.
my throat is bruised, my back is scarred, my vagina feels like it's going to fall off.. you're like godzilla. you destroy everything.
No more house parties. We're almost fucking 30 years old and I slept until 6 pm.
I've got to stop fucking tourists. If Chicagos piazza is anything like their dicks. I'm moving.
True fear is being unable to remember where you hid your weed and vibrator in your parent's house.
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
Randomize