The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
she called my cock the "semen sword" and then we invented a position called excalibur
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
We're playing Edward Bottle-of-eight-dollar-sale-wine-hands now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
I woke up naked with my work shoes on
Oh Jesus our whore days are numbered
*jedi mind trick* you want to go down on me
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.
My parents are coming to visit the 28th. How bad is it that I put a reminder in my phone to "hide sex toys"?
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