It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
I have a sudden craving for National Treasure 2. THIS IS WHY DRUGS ARE AWESOME
I think it was our ex-neighbor Mike. He leaves Taco Bell outside our door a lot
He'll drop off his extra tacos at our place bc he's super high when he orders & can't eat them all
I thought you were single?
I am. But thats cuz no one wants to marry shame and regret doused in tequila. But thanks for reminding me ya dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should.
I am on top of a rooftop peeing on your freedom
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
There is nothing wrong with watching parks and rec all day then getting blackout drunk by night
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
Your vagina is like Nancy Drew lately.
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
No, he wouldn't have sex with me....but on the brightside I managed to fit the entire falafel sandwhich in my purse!!
Listen, she cheated on him first. I've known both of them since we were 12. They have no secrets from me. And yes, as a matter of fact, I absolutely did enjoy screaming out his name into his, soon to be, ex wife's pillow.
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