just sold my soul for a pack of cigaroos. little do they know they got the short end of the deal. suckers.
Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
Did we have sex last night?
I think that was the general idea until I got you undressed and you puked on me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you didnt know i had herpes?
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
Every time I stand up, gravity punches me in the tits. This is horrible.
Vodka drinking games. Where you wake up next to a douche lord and see your thong in the blinds.
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As an added realisation of today. If we used the last time I got laid as a conceiving date I would have a two week old baby. It's been too long...
Hey mom, soo do we have a family lawyer or am I on my own for that?
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
You can help me! We'll make an occasion of it. Have some rum, make some smores, condemn the email system to the pits of hell...
It's 3 am. Nothing I've tried can get the taste of failure and vomit out of my mouth.
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