you wouldn't even come home last night... Dead to me
this girl just gave me her phone number and 5 mins later right in front of me she is giving her number to another dude
call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing
The only way im leaving this casino is in a golden chariot or an ambulance
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far.
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
Missing part of a tooth cos I tried to open a beer with my teeth, just saw a dude that looked like bill Cosby though so things are looking up
They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
Do you think the firemen will remember me?
Yes. But you were sloppy, sobbing, and puked on two of them. You won't get in their pants.
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
When creating your wedding guest list do you put the girl you & your fiance had a threesome with under your friends or his friends?
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