Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
Not sure why, but I was running back and forth across the road. Cab hit me and gave us a free ride home.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude. All those hangovers I never had came back with a vengeance. I just opened the door of this car to barf. The car was not motionless. We are on the autobahn.
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
thanks for not telling him i named my trumpet after his dick
You have to summon your inner elephant
Yeah! I was just fired because there was an over hire and the new girl is hotter than me. Seeing as how the new girl is my baby sister I think punching my manager is excusable.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Summary of my night: made out with a complete stranger at a club dressed in the Geico gecko costume...
Everyone called me "Barf Vader".. And I lost your lightsaber.
While randomly hooking up with my neighbor last night he says "it's okay we're neighbors".
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
HE CHOSE A RESTAURANT AND MADE A FUCKING RESERVATION. I AM SHOOK
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