we need blinds so i can safely watch porn during the day
At the bar dressed as a taco. not a typo. Come down.
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
could you please tell me why you thought vodka soaked band aids were a good idea?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
that's probably because you left your arm in the fishtank for 90% of the night
You're right. Single life welcomed me back with open arms. It's like it knew it wasnt going to be long when I left.
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
I just had sex in the footy bunny pajamas my mom bought me for christmas. Tis the season
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
AND I HAVE A NICE COCK! A STRIPPER TOLD ME SO IT MUST BE TRUE!
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
AND I woke up to eggs in my bra. Thanks Taco Cabana...
Also, what day were you thinkin we should trip balls at the children's museum?
HAMMERED.. I made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with toilet paper instead of bread...
HEY I WILL KIDNAP THE FUCK OUT OF YOUR PET GOAT
Randomize