You tried to tip the paramedic for finding you.
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
We really need to stop competing to see who can get more drunk, and I REALLY need to stop winning.
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
As shirtless as possible
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
Are you high right now?
is that a question or a drake reference?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't decide if I'm depressed or if this is just what life without a bidet feels like.
He's attempting to seduce me with thanksgiving-themed sexual metaphors... It's working.
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
I mean, if you want to light yourself on fire for maximum accuracy, far be it from me to stop you
I just woke up to my family in the living room watching our security camera tape of me last night talking to a stop sign in our backyard... How the fuck did I get that in the yard?
why did you kick open the doors at church screaming whos ready to party?
Randomize