While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
Chipotle chips and wine for breakfast. Its def game day
Then you ran outside and said you were gonna give the snowman a blowjob
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Somewhere between catching the stove on fire and not being aware of it being on fire while I'm in the living room. I drank too much.
He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick.
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
Touche. Dude, I fastened garters. Drunk. I deserve a medal from a drag queen.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey, I'm renting a storage locker for the summer to keep all my bondage shit in so my parents don't see it. You wanna split on it for your all your weed shit?
I hate vagina strikes, but I must not stray from my path. My boyfriend will know the true meaning of blue balls.
Did we really just set fireworks off in a cemetery? Or was that a dream?
I think so and I think we were sober.
I may or may not have hooked up with the cop who arrested me.. Or I can cross hooking up with a stripper in a cop outfit off my bucket list.
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
Randomize