i fucked some guy last night. i called him nick jonas by mistake. i'm 24.
so my mom just told me that she wouldnt pick me up and take us to taco bell at 3AM...
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No she left bc the of pic I have of my mom in my bathroom. She thought it was my gf
Why the hell do you have a picture of YOUR MOM in your bathroom?!?!
Dude if you're not gonna answer them I'm gonna stop snapchatting you my hook ups
Drunk me obviously wants to fuck up my life
It's like I have an arch nemesis, and it's me
There is a doctor sitting next to me at lunch talking about the engorged scrotum surgery he did this morning and I am about to lose my professional grown adult facade.
I woke up on his couch and my bra was flung across the floor and filled with animal crackers
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
He told me I'm a small core of pure evil wrapped up in sweetness, gold, and puppies. He gets me.
That is beautiful
Stoned. Scared. Bring pool noodle and onion rings.
There comes a point where there's just condoms and old mcdonalds in your garbage can and you can't tell if you've won or lost.
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
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