I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
Who knew that being in a committed relationship is the same thing as forced celibacy? Did not sign up for this.
I woke up and went to my kitchen naked and decided I wanted a fruit cup. Ate said fruit cup. Look over and notice my male neighbor is staring at me
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
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I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
so i woke up.. still drunk and discovered my roommate in the living room passed out dick-in-hand watching porn..
What did u do?
turned the porn up and opened the windows so everybody goin to class could see him..
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
I feel the need to send all my exes pictures of penises larger than theirs. Because they all must suffer.
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asked the cab driver where he learned Swahili last night.
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
Cooked breakfast with his mom this morning...I'm like the housewife of one night stands
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
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