I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
Let's play a little game called "Chill the Fuck Out" - you're our first contestant
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
Can you call him, he said something about going to the balcony to pee and now hes texting me saying hes lost
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just threw up in nordstroms while shopping for moms bday with dad. He distracted workers for me. No more tequila
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
It's okay. My lingerie drawer is skanky enough for the two of us. Even across borders.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
Um...It has come to my attention that I may have said some rather vulgar things about Sean Connery to you and anyone listening last night, so...I apologize for that. I meant the things I said. But still. Sorry.
I just gave parenting advice and had a discussion about the distribution of wealth in america...in a bar. I'm starting to think its me and not you lol
I guess she was just worried I'd end up sleeping with you again
It's not too late to disappoint her you know...
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
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