so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
two words: fractured penis. two more: emergency room.
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can I use you as a job reference? Don't tell them i got you fired cause I banged you tho
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
No foreplay. Missionary. Too quick. And he owns a fedora.
I almost fell asleep reading that.
I almost fell asleep fucking it.
Her delivery came. She's ordered a pack of 144 condoms.
Also I feel I should tell you last night when I came home I fell into my laundry hamper and woke up in a pile of my clothes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had to switch coats with someone at work because you can see the giant sex choke bruise on my neck. Being kinky is hard.
The CEO is puking on the sidewalk and the HR director just offered me coke. Engineers have the best parties
The bar tender had his entire hand down your asscrack.
I forgot about that. I was in MULTIPLE dimensions.
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
I hope you have your own chainsaw cause I didn’t buy one for you. It was a gross oversight on my part
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
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