i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
I was so high I couldn't tell if they were goosebumps or herpes.
I'm not 100% sure, but I think someone gave me a bath last night...
in hindsight, $10 Malibu buckets were a terrible idea...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She bit a glass in half.
I don't care how many kiddie pools are in our house. One is too many.
This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
I'm having mini little movies in my head. Like for example. You were talking to a blue whale with jazz man sunglasses, but not the ray charles jazz sunglass. More like sunglasses that are round. Anyway, he has a baguette and stupid french hat. And you , you had your harry potter glasses.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"I'm gonna wax that ass" was the successful pick up line used on me last night. Clearly I had a few too many cause it worked..
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
Do you think I'm short enough to dress up in a ghost costume and go trick or treating and have people believe that I'm actually a child?
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
Shame - the story of my life.
Randomize