does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
Remember when the only STD we had to worry about were hickies? Those were the days
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
you kept shouting how the only tree you would hump is an elm tree because they're under populated
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Never ever ever ever ever ever give your number to a 30 year old at buffalo wild wings. Ever ever ever.
My sister was crawling her way home and kept asking us to carry her,then she insisted on grabbing at our ankles til she passed out, how was your night?
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
No, absolutely not. If you see that cunt, throw confetti or eggs at her.
That's a pretty extreme jump from confetti to eggs
Last thing I ever expected to say, "Get your finger out of my ear or I will stop sucking your dick."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
I just need some dick and some jimmy johns
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
I'm now consulting a magic eight ball on all major life decisions. On another note I think I have chlamydia.
Thanks for having me over last night. Sorry I licked rum off your kitchen floor.
He makes bad life choices and drives a wagon, how is that not my type?
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