Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
my soul wont recognize me after tonight
every time fb tells me a dude i fucked is now friends with another dude ive fucked, i die a little inside. thats way more honesty than im comfortable with.
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
I was just "that girl you seen blowing some dude outside when you drove by"
WHAT DO YOU MEAN I DIDN'T APOLOGIZE? THERE WAS A PEACE OFFERING MADE VIA TACO BELL.
You're cordially invited to the love nest for alcoholic and aquatic adventures. Also known as an all expense paid trip to my pool, alcohol, and vagina.
Just saw a cougar do the walk of shame. She asked housekeeping where the fastest elevator was.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
Thank you for calling me on to a higher level of debauchery. fuck anyone who says we aren't good for each other
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
I lost half a toenail and didn't realize it. Bloody shoe shoulda been a clue.
She kept giving the uber driving directions and we all thought they were wrong so we'd send him the other way. Turns out she wasn't guiding us home, but to the half gallon that she hid in the bushes on the way to the bar.
Randomize