Whod you bang
And then you told your sister how horrible of a friend I was because I couldn't get you cheese fries...
His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
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we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
OMG stoned with flashing lights behind me, I was freaking out until I realized I wasn't driving my couch
i'm having flashbacks of crying and telling you i was made out of egg salad.
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
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There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
The little girl I'm babysitting is having a tea party, the water and chips she's passing out are doing wonders for my hangover.
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
You spent twenty minutes waxing poetic about her ass and her thighs
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