Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
He's like the houdini of condoms. I never even realized he put one on before we fucked. he's magical.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
Awkward family moment #1: walked in on my 15 yr old nephew packing a bowl. Nephew says- "lets not ruin christmas and keep this our little secret"
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
I'm thinking about wearing a strap-on just to freak him out the next time he pulls my pants off.
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
If you get home and there is an older woman there, its my mom. She wants to come and see the place after work. Just an FYI. Not the older sluts I bang.
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
I’M DRUNK AND EXCITED.
Sitting on my couch watching TV in my underwear drinking a bottle of wine.... and you want to interrupt me to come pick you up. No I will not do it.
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