Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
dude i just figured out that the tostitos sign is two people eating chips and salsa. being high totally pays off sometimes
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
There is a pube in my fucking eyeball
you're being stingy. if you didnt want people to have sex on your couch, you shouldve specifically said so.
I only get commercials for vodka and Rogaine now. You're exactly right, Hulu. That's exactly right.
Hovering on the line between her being fuckable and me being too drunk to fuck. Life's juggling act in progress here.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
I woke up in an apt hallway this morning and a nice lady brought me coffee cause she thought I was homeless
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
His weed is so good that I don't wanna risk loosing him as my weed man so I plan to keep him in the friend zone 😂
How was your night?
Fell down a flight of stairs. Went to a sex dungeon. Was approached by a man in a leather harness.
I got dominos and had to stop whilst eating and take a moment of silence for how good it was
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