Why did u sent me a picture of a dead horse?
i could hear you having sex and was jealous, wanted to kill the mood
My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
Katie is reenacting me jizzing in her eye via emoticons...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there was this guy running across campus barefoot in the pouring rain stepping in all the puddles. i want his life. and i want to be stripper.
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
honestly, i'm just crying in the kitchen naked and eating salsa
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your cousin just asked the bartender to start a round of vagina shots. Not body shots. Vagina shots. We're taking her out more often.
We just had father kitten bonding time .. I was on the toilet , he was climbing the animal print shower curtain . It was magical
my mom called me mid shot and i accidentally answered and kept calling her my own name. somehow i thought that would help the situation.
Come over. I've made 2 dinners and so many cocktails. I'm a 50's housewife with no family.
Lets trade lives
And i will lay in bed and piss all over everywhere, drink whiskey and have sex with married bears
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
Randomize