i want you now
you need to stop dating girls with the same name as your mother...or stop drinking so much...I don't want to see this
Did you know Kal Penn works at the white house? That's almost white castle.
Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was pretty stoned. I thought I needed a seatbelt at the restaurant.
He's playing farmville on his phone while puking over the toilet..
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
I'm concerned you might be passed out on a random rooftop right now. Not concerned enough to do anything about it. Hope you're alive. Goodnight.
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He asked me "did you used to go to church" while we were having sex.
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
And then I discovered that while drunk last night I called the NAACP and left an angry voicemail demanding they fix the racism at my school
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
oh man there are to hot chicks wrestling in a pool of maple syrup. ill send you a picture
this is why i will never break up with you
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