If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
just opened a can of spagetti o's with a butter knife. the things u will do for food when ur stoned.
I gave them both handjobs at the same time. Felt like I was skiing
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
Did you spray paint that captain morgan fifth that's in the freezer gold?
Do you remember Kelly my alter personality? She talked like a man and would sing amazing grace?
Until she magically finds a brain, I'm going to be a dick. Fair trade. She's a idiot, I'm an ass.
I smell like icyhot and vodka... Heres to my pulled tendon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You shut your whore mouth, we don't talk about Drunk Nutella night.
So a guy died and our dates revived him with CPR. Good night?
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
The end of the friendship was inevitable. I hooked up with her cousin and forgot to mention it to her
If there's one thing I think I could really excel it, it's curating a midlife crisis
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