This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
closing bar tabs have helped me with simple math in college.
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
She showed up to the party with a live octopus and a 30 pack that was already half gone
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
When you can pee with one hand accurately while texting, you drink too much.
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
My tinder date had to be home by 8:30 cause she's on house arrest.
My relationship: I'm wearing batman panties and a tiara right now trying to get laid and he's doing dishes.
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
I'm making a will, in it I'm leaving you my skull.
I'm going to go ahead and refrain from sexting you in an airport that is currently at a "level orange" security threat.
Randomize