Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
I'm in my winter jacket and nothing else. very drunk. bring bitches.
i keep seeing random pieces of my outfit all around town.
I can't believe im sexting my roommate. This is really what my life has come to
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
She just passive-aggressively stripped in the kitchen while humming the theme to Doug.
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
im trying to look as sober as possible but i just poured orange juice and mayo into my milkshake.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
you licked my face then when I finally got you to the bathroom, mid puke you said you liked the taste of my foundation.....you weren't drunk at all....
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
I’m getting back at my ex and training my new boy toy how to properly satisfy a woman. I’m killing two birds with one dick.
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