your room smells of hookers.
And success
Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
dude, osama threatened the US again
dude. i slept with your sister last night
what?
I saw that as an opertune moment to drop some big news
she kept yelling 'call me bella'
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He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song.
Marry him
Standing here next to my mom talking to my friend trying to act like he doesn't sell me E every weekend.
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
why is there cat hair all over my deoderant?
she wanted to smell more freshershest than you.
He is passed out on the kitchen floor. He will fight you if you disturb him. Just a warning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
We're listening to space jam. This can only be a good omen.
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
He lasted less than 30 sec. in bed and then sent me a friend request on LinkedIn. Wtf.
Randomize