i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
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I had to carry you down because your legs weren't moving anymore but you were carrying the weights you stole from that guys room... and that's where the bruises came from.
I held a cracker & gaterade down for an hour. I feel like this will be my greatest accomplishment of the day.
it took me 20 minutes to get her upstairs... she crawled under a car and wouldn't come out.
About to go out with the girl of my dreams tonight. I am looking at one of her hottest fb pics, to practice not looking at her huge tits.
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
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Remember when we partied so hard that dude died and it cockblocked you hooking up with my sister?
I forgot that happened. That's the second dude that died on a vacation I've been on
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
He told me to be a woman and make him dinner. So I threw a bagel at him and went out to dinner.
Let's drink lean at the 5 seconds of summer concert. Give the teens a glimpse into their future as dysfunctional adults holding desperately onto their youth. You in?
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
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