thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
Taylor Swift is so right about you.
Every morning i wake up and check his twitter like a horoscope
she sang that "this little piggy song" to my balls. and somehow made it work, with me only having two balls instead of five.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she called me a fuckfaceshitdick. not that's creative. it sounds like a crayola crayon, preferrably an orange-brown shade.
Not even drunk me wanted to have sex with him. I kept intentionally hitting my head on the table behind me during sex till he said i was too drunk for sex.
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the only two hours i was sober on this trip and i managed to break my toe. no one will believe this.
Ok so last thing I remember was hugging a cop while vomiting
i'm teaching a bunch of people how to grow weed over snapchat. no shame.
He fingered me to the beat of the Fresh Prince theme song... it was pretty fantastic.
It's almost sad. It's like the Harambe of vagina stories really.
so I'm walking to my last final while opening my giant red bull and i look over to my right and the guy beside me had one too and was looking back at me. without missing a beat he pulls out a bottle of jager, pours half in mine, half in his and goes "cheers"....i'm not even mad i probably failed my final
Randomize