What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am just pathetic enough to be sitting on the couch with my cat drinking absinthe and vodka watching moulin rouge. Hello, tuesday night.
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
Were you rubbing your penis on me while I slept? I smell like penis.
He better not be in your backpack
Maybe there is a secret pocket full of cocaine in that spiderman wallet.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drunk dialed the ex last nigh; turns out I miss dialed. The stranger who answered played along and apologized for sleeping with my cousin. She sent me a txt this morning to let me know.
Kindest stranger ever. Marry that girl.
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
2016 shall be rememered as the year I sharted while putting up the Christmas tree.
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