One night stand!! Now I'm pissing excellence
That burning is chlamydia
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
Just caught my first cougar this fake was worth every fucking penny.
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And there might be a gallon of sangria without the lid on the floor in your room. Just be careful when you open the door.
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
You know you have done too many drugs when you gum the sugar off your margarita without even thinking twice
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
all I want for my birthday is booze and sex toys. don't bother calling if neither of those are included.
he said to "slap him" after he guessed the time correctly. i did.
My new gym is popular with trophy wives. They’re talking about yachts and plastic surgery
Learn their secrets! I want to meet men with Maseratis. The meat heads and Mustangs scene is getting old
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