its like the voldemort of pregnancies, we don't talk about it
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
You know its bad when you can over hear the planned parenthood nurses talking shit behind your back... they've seen everything
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
I feel like my lungs want to punch me in the vagina.
is that even a sentence?
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
I deserve to be covered in dicks
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
SShout out to Barney the Dinosaur for teaching me how to sing the ABCs backward. I just scored a free pitcher.
Dude, if that was the MLB player I think it was leaving your bedroom this morning please tell me you got his autograph. It could pay the rent for like six months.
Trying to stay sober at a family function but hiccuping so fucking loud. "Have you been drinking?" I hit on my cousin so yeah. I have been drinking.
my mom asked me why i was covered in scratches, blood, and dirt this morning..i answered "i was planking obviously" and walked away
I yelled at your uterus for you.
I told him I thought I was pregnant and he told me he accidentally killed my bird.
Circle of life.
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