Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
I just heard a woman call her child a butt face. Repeatedly. He's crying now. I love walmart.
just puked in a purse in the store. some girl asked if i was gonna buy it now and i laughed and asked her why id want a bag some dude just puked in. her face looked like she saw the devil.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
According to google history I spent most of last night trying to buy an elephant.
You know i think she's just using me for sex
I hate you.
I'm setting a 12:15 alarm for a taco bell run. Be awake or never wake up again.
I'm sooo hungover. I fell asleep on top of a car in a parking lot last night. New one to add to the list.
It seems that only way I've actually improved myself after 2 years of writing for the school newspaper is that I've mastered the art of descriptive words to improve my sexting skills
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
Do exhausted, barely concealed hand jobs count as joining the mile high club?
Sarah was butt-chugging wine and diarrhea'd all over the wall
Every time I download Tinder again, I hate myself a little more.
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she cant stop having the shits.
Randomize