well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
He asked about stds. I told him I don't have any... which I don't. They are now called sti's. Whooopsie
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
The polish Muslims are throwin paczkis into the crowd and I'm beer 6 before 11 am
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
If u ever apologize to me for "too-rough" sex again I will suspend ur all-access pass to my vagina indefinitely
Shooting a bottle rocket from my penis was entirely justified. Twenty bucks is twenty buck no matter how you look at it
She said she hasn't cheated on me in 7 and a half days and she'd like praise for that.
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
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