I think a homeless person took a bath in my mouth while I was sleeping :(
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
Did I happen to mention where i left my keys when I drunk dialed you last night
he tried breathing fire using moonshine and a roman candle. would not have believed it unless i actually witnessed it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
On a scale of 1 to 3, with 1 being the smallest and 3 being the largest, what size nipple pasty do you think I am?
My ex just sent me a message asking if she could blow me, but only if we get caught by her new bf. If she promises to swallow I'm doing it.
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
You know you're good at multi-tasking if you can get a lap dance from someone while simultaneously eating a burrito.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I shouldn't have to tell you to stop throwing knives at me.
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
That's why my boobs are so big, they're full of secrets.
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
I’m so poor I’m filling a flask with vodka and bringing it to the bar.
I saw that he had a tattoo of a map of New Jersey on his arm, so i slowed down to like 20mph and pushed him out of the car
Randomize