Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
She just sent me a txt where every word ended in "zzz", with about a hundred "!!!" and called herself "juicezzz". I need back up.
my vagina has a 5:00 shadow
careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
a creepy fucking ass man came up and started raven cawwing in my ear... he said it was the raven mating call. i am officially freaked out
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
A man and his most likely hooker just bought us Taco Bell.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
Also the bouncer Straight up told me my id was shitty and I should get a new one. But he let me in anyways because #boobz
You just referred to a pillow with a stolen bra strapped to it as "she". Let that sink in for a minute.
So...I was fapping and during it, I got an Amber Alert notification...that's just bad timing.
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
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