OMG I just tried to text you something dirty but accidentally texted the obama campaign
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
someone, somewhere in austin has to have a muppet
Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
This was worse than the time that I shot a bald eagle.
He taught me how to drive a stick by using his dick. He even made the whurrrr noise so I knew when to change gears.
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
Whoever I saved in my phone as "Jackpot" last night has your keys.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
in the future when you find clothing in your street, just assume it's mine.
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
my life is like one bad, slutty lifetime movie.
Last night I tried to apply for a job at ihop. That drunk.
For future reference: bathtub full of cheeseburgers = win.
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