I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
Youre attempt to ruin my night by putting Date Rape by Sublime on my sex playlist failed. She was into it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
I want you to get your positive energy all over me. I want to to look like something from Ghostbusters.
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
Conversations we need to have while high 1) how mermaids reproduce 2) if blind people hallucinate what do they see 3) reincarnation
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am thankful for thumbs.
Because without thumbs, we would be dolphins.
Land dolphins.
Why is there multiple peanut butter and toasts stuck to the fridge door?
I was told I look like trouble once and that was by a fireman at the sex show. I was carrying two beers and a penis pinata.
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
omg girl... i cut your hair last night. tell me it looks okay!? i saw hair on the counter and i said ohhh nooo
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
Randomize