We George Forman grilled some girls phone last night.
And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
you need to not memorize your credit card number for drunk pizza
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
Drinking franzia alone at noon watching a cheese themed episode of "The Chew" I'm ready to admit I need a job.
He just sent me a picture of himself naked while cooking pancakes and he made the caption "bitchin' in the kitchen"
I have 7 papers to write and I already bought gas station ice cream in my pjs and questioned whether or not a beer float was a thing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
god it feels good to gold a bottle of opiates again.
I think that typo was actually more appropriate than what you intended.
Things you Cant unsee: When your smartphone syncs to your dads laptop and downloads photos...including his porn stash.
She pinched my nipples out of nowhere as I was about to come... I think I found god
Are you going to eat tacos off the floor again?
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
Imma go take shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
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